It was a hard night. Not because I had something to do, but because my mind was refusing to turn off the light. I was too busy to think about today, about this and about him. Now I can't do anything about him, but I can do something about this. I refuse to be scared and I refuse to give up. I remember what Carlos told me last night and I hope that bending my knees and crossing my legs will do the charm. Here goes nothing.
I closed my eyes while I made the first slide. It wasn't a good idea, cause besides the fact that I felt all of my weight dragging me towards the snow, I couldn't see if I even moved. As I made contact with the ground I realized that I had nothing to be afraid of. Unlike ice (in skating), snow is fluffy and puffy and doesn't hurt at all.
I started laughing as I was trying to get up. The boots where too heavy and the skies to long. How the hell does anyone lift themselves up? Someone helped me get up. I tried again. I felt again. And again. And again. It was terrible. Not the fact that I as falling all the time, but not being able to get up all by myself was getting on my nerves. Until the perfect moment when I put all my strength in my hands, I pushed and I got up. I felt again, I got up again... My fear was gone.
After a few hours of falling, I finally got the scheme. I bended my knees, I crossed a bit the legs, I went in diagonal and I put the weight on one leg to change the direction. Then I put the weight on the other leg. Then, at reaching the bottom of the hill, I stopped. On my feet. Not on my ass. I started cheering and I didn't care one bit that all of them were watching me. I bet they smiled too. For me. I went up again, I came down. Each slide gave me more power. I can do it. I can do anything!
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