Future?

After hearing my sister saying the terrible words "Cata, don't you realize that this year I will turn 28!" I make a fast calculation in my mind, as sqrt(cos(x))*cos(200 x)+sqrt(abs(x))-0.7)*(4-x*x)^0.01... to see what's my age and when I finally have my result I ... I am shocked! 

I will be 27 years old, this October. 27. It seemed like yesterday I had 20 years old and the whole world was at my feet. Now I am almost 27 and I can't see myself in 5 years. I mean I can see myself professionally speaking : still washing dishes!! (Let's hope I don't jinx my future, cause I would really hate to have as one of  my top stories : "Today was a good day.. Didn't break any glass!"... )

Now seriously talking, I am 26, going on 27 and no future plans. I think one of my common lines lately is "I will die alone and my dogs will eat me because nobody will call to see if i'm alright... and because nobody will find my body they will think that I eloped in some foreign country with a beautiful stranger... I eloped because I finally realized that being married isn't the worse thing that can happen to a couple... And they would be so wrong, cause I would be in the belly of my dogs... My 10 dogs... ". Why do I have this terrible thoughts? Cause I want to have many dogs :))). No, it's because I can't see myself being as committed as somebody should be in order to have a relationship. 

My sister starts laughing at seeing my concentrated face and she tells me in between the HaHaHas "You know you will die forever alone, don't you"

A tear almost bursts into the corner of my eye. The smallest violin of the world is finally playing for me... FUUUCK!