duminică, 27 noiembrie 2011

Closure ...

She looked for him in the crowd and when she finally spotted him, he was staring at her. After so many months of ignoring her, it was almost unreal that he stared at her. She turned around, as for reassuring herself that it's not a mistake, and after that she started walking towards him. She didn't know if her heart was bouncing because of the emotions or just because she danced a lot that night. As he was closing up, her memories of their last talk were starting to appear in her head.
"It doesn't matter anymore". She still had a good image of her last sentence written on the messenger window and now, into her mind, it appeared like a glow on the laptop's screen. It should have been the last sentence she was ever supposed to address him. But now, after seeing him,something inside her wanted to clarify everything.
"Hi" she said with a broken smile. Checking his features she was wondering what exactly was the trigger of her feelings for him. 
He raised his eyebrow and without even noticing her desperate figure he took her hand and whispered in a sensual tone "Finally, realized you are missing me?" He wanted to kiss her ear, but she slowly pushed him away.
"Do you have 5 minutes for me?" 
"Baby, I have more than 5 min. If everything goes a'right, I can give you a morning too" with an embrace he was trying to push her gentle into the wall. 
She looked at him with sorrow in her eyes. If she would have had more drinks, she probably would be in his bed by now. Unfortunately she didn't. Unfortunately.
She released herself from the embrace and taking his hand into her own she led him outside. She went to the hidden bench and sat him slowly on it. He didn't want to let go of her arm and he was trying to find her mouth with his lips. Growling like a small bear he was thinking that she was in mood for jokes so he grabbed her in a forced embraced and kissed her firmly. She was taking by surprise and after he released her from the embrace she slapped him as strong as she could. 
The sound of the slap was still in the air. All the alcohol vanished at the touch of her hand with his cheek. He was looking at her. With her hand shaking she was wondering why did she react like that.
"We were supposed to be perfect for each other" she turned her face towards him. "We were supposed to be perfect for each other. Why did you screw this up?" she asked while she sat next to him. 
He turned his eye to the tree next to the bench and his leaps, so eager to open a few seconds ago, now were shut in a deep silence. 
"I always wonder why did I fancy you. You are one of the worst guys I ever had something to do with." she began her speech without knowing how exactly would this help her feel better. "And still my guts tell me that you are a good person deep down inside. But I am tired. You know why we are so perfect one for the other? Do you?" She was looking for his eyes. She touched his face and their eyes meet. 
"We are perfect because both of us are looking for persons that leave us. I am looking for guys that aren't reliable and that don't see in me more than a tool, and you are looking for girls that leave you for another life, man or country. In a weird sense, we are actually more alike than I'd want to. You are a mess inside and you stopped believing. I am ... " she smiled. 
She raise from the bench and she left without saying anything. 
As she was heading for the bus station she realized that she isn't crying. It was so simple. Everything. Life. Him. She should have stopped chasing shadows. At least she didn't came for nothing. She now knew that this chapter of her life is over.

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